Definition and pronunciation
have sex — a neutral verb phrase meaning to engage in sexual activity, often specifically sexual intercourse, between consenting adults.
Pronounced /hæv sɛks/ (hav seks).
Easy explanation
Have sex is the plain, respectful way to say two adults engage in sexual activity. It’s widely used in health, education, and news because it is clear and not crude.
Part of speech and grammar
- Verb phrase: have + sex; tenses as with have: has/had/having sex.
- Partner pattern: have sex with [someone].
- Modifiers: consensual/protected/safer sex; unprotected sex; vaginal/anal/oral sex; casual sex; premarital sex.
- Countability: sex is uncountable in this phrase (have a sex ✗).
- Formality: adding sexual (have sexual intercourse) makes it more clinical.
Register and tone
Plain, neutral, and appropriate in most contexts where sexual activity must be named without slang. Preferable to crude terms in professional or public writing.
Connection to sexuality
Directly about sexuality. The phrase should always imply consent, mutual respect, and legality. Where clarity matters (medical, legal), specify type (e.g., oral sex with barriers).
Common collocations
have sex with [partner], have protected/safer sex, have unprotected sex, have sex after/before [event], have sex during pregnancy, first time having sex, decide not to have sex, have casual sex, have sex regularly
Idioms and set phrases
have sexual intercourse, have sexual relations, safe sex/safer sex, sex life (related noun phrase)
Prepositions and nuance
- with [someone] — names the partner: had sex with a long-term partner.
- without [protection/consent] — absence; without consent is criminal and should be named as such (e.g., rape), not as “sex.”
- during/after/before [time/condition] — timing/health: sex during pregnancy (if approved by a clinician).
- for [reason] — motive (informal): didn’t have sex for the wrong reasons.
Word comparisons
- make love — romantic, tender tone.
- sleep with — common euphemism; neutral in journalism.
- be intimate — can be sexual or emotional; add physically/emotionally for clarity.
- have intercourse — clinical/formal.
- hook up — casual social framing.
- get laid / bang — slang or vulgar; avoid in respectful contexts.
Real-life examples
- They chose not to have sex until they’d discussed boundaries and testing.
- Public health campaigns teach how to have safer sex with barrier methods.
- The survey asked whether respondents had sex in the previous month.
- After surgery, patients should ask when it’s safe to have sex again.
Sample sentences
- We agreed to have sex only after we both felt ready and informed.
- They’ve decided to have sex with protection until test results come back.
- The booklet explains pain during sex and when to talk to a clinician.
- It’s fine to say no and not have sex; consent is ongoing.
Synonyms
have sexual intercourse, have intercourse, sleep with, make love, be intimate, engage in sexual relations, copulate, hook up
Antonyms
abstain, practice celibacy, remain platonic, refrain, say no
Related terms
consent, contraception, barrier methods, condoms, dental dam, PrEP, STI prevention, testing, lubrication, aftercare, boundaries, monogamy, open relationship
Notes and etiquette
Use explicit, people-first wording when consent or safety is at issue (e.g., nonconsensual sexual act = rape/assault). Avoid slang in professional settings. Specify type of sex when medically relevant, and center mutual consent and dignity.
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