Ceterosexual: Nonbinary Attraction, Meaning, and Respectful Usage

Nonbinary is a broad category that may include people who identify as:

• agender;
• bigender;
• genderfluid;
• genderqueer;
• demigender;
• another gender outside exclusive manhood or womanhood.

Simple examples include:

• Alex identifies as ceterosexual because their attraction centers on nonbinary people.
• A ceterosexual person may have any gender identity.
• Being ceterosexual does not mean being attracted to every nonbinary person.
• A ceterosexual person may also use a broader label such as bisexual or queer.
• The meaning of ceterosexual should be based on how the individual uses the term.

• cetero- — from a Latin root relating to “the other” or “the rest”;
• sexual — relating here to sexual attraction or orientation.

As an adjective, it describes orientation or attraction:

• a ceterosexual person;
• ceterosexual attraction;
• a ceterosexual identity.

As a noun, it refers to a person:

• They identify as a ceterosexual.
• Some ceterosexuals also use the word queer.

The noun ceterosexuality refers to the orientation:

• Ceterosexuality describes attraction centered on nonbinary genders.

Because the term is uncommon, a short explanation may be helpful when using it outside LGBTQ+ or gender-diverse communities.

Some definitions allow a person of any gender to use the label when their attraction is directed mainly or exclusively toward nonbinary people.

Other community definitions reserve or especially encourage the term for nonbinary people describing attraction to other nonbinary people. Under this narrower use, the label may function as a nonbinary-centered orientation rather than a general term for anyone attracted to nonbinary people.

Identity language develops through community use and may change over time. When definitions differ, the person’s own explanation should receive priority.

Ceteroromantic describes romantic attraction toward nonbinary or genderqueer people.

A person’s sexual and romantic orientations may align or differ.

For example, someone may be:

• ceterosexual and ceteroromantic;
• ceterosexual but biromantic;
• ceteroromantic and asexual;
• ceterosexual while using no romantic-orientation label.

Sexual attraction, romantic attraction, emotional closeness, and relationship behavior are related but separate experiences.

A bisexual person may be attracted to nonbinary people as well as women, men, or other genders.

Ceterosexual is more specific because it centers attraction on nonbinary genders.

Some people may use both labels:

• bisexual as a familiar umbrella identity;
• ceterosexual as a more precise description of their attraction.

Using one label does not automatically exclude the other.

Ceterosexual focuses specifically on nonbinary or genderqueer people.

A pansexual person may be attracted to women, men, and nonbinary people. A ceterosexual person’s attraction is centered more narrowly on genders outside the binary.

Neither orientation means attraction to every individual within the relevant gender groups.

A polysexual person may be attracted to several nonbinary genders and one or more binary genders.

A ceterosexual person may describe their attraction as being focused primarily or exclusively on nonbinary genders.

The most suitable word depends on the person’s actual pattern of attraction and preferred level of specificity.

The word has been criticized because its Greek root can mean “bent” or “crooked.” Early definitions also sometimes grouped trans men and trans women together as people outside ordinary manhood and womanhood. Many users therefore adopted ceterosexual as a more neutral alternative focused on nonbinary attraction.

Skoliosexual may still appear in older glossaries or as a label chosen by particular individuals. It should not be imposed on someone who prefers ceterosexual or another term.

A nonbinary person may be:

• masculine;
• feminine;
• androgynous;
• gender-neutral;
• fluid in presentation;
• medically transitioning or not transitioning;
• assigned female, male, or intersex at birth.

Ceterosexual attraction should not be reduced to attraction toward one stereotypical androgynous appearance.

A person’s gender identity may not be visible from clothing, voice, anatomy, or body shape. Respectful attraction includes recognizing how the person identifies rather than assigning them a label based only on appearance.

Attraction recognizes a whole person who has an individual personality, identity, body, history, and boundaries.

Fetishization reduces someone mainly to their gender difference, treats them as an unusual sexual experience, or assumes that all nonbinary people have similar bodies or behaviors.

Respectful dating involves:

• learning the person’s name and pronouns;
• avoiding invasive questions about anatomy;
• not expecting one person to represent every nonbinary identity;
• communicating about attraction without objectification;
• respecting privacy and consent.

However, expression and identity are different.

A masculine-presenting person may be nonbinary, a man, a woman, or another gender. A feminine or androgynous appearance does not prove that someone is nonbinary.

Attraction may begin through appearance, but respectful interaction allows people to define their own genders.

• understand recurring patterns of attraction;
• explain their experiences;
• locate community;
• feel recognized;
• communicate with partners.

No one is required to use ceterosexual, even when the definition appears to fit.

A person may instead prefer bisexual, polysexual, queer, nonbinary-loving, no label, or another identity. Sexual terminology evolves, and preferred definitions may differ among individuals and communities.

A ceterosexual person must still:

• ask before initiating intimate contact;
• respect rejection;
• avoid pressuring someone to disclose anatomy;
• protect private identity information;
• discuss sexual-health needs;
• honor relationship agreements;
• recognize each partner as an individual.

Being attracted to someone’s gender does not grant access to their body, medical history, or private experiences.

Every ceterosexual person is nonbinary.
Some definitions reserve the term for nonbinary users, while others allow people of any gender to use it.

Ceterosexual and pansexual mean the same thing.
Pansexuality may include all genders, while ceterosexuality centers nonbinary genders.

Ceterosexual people are attracted to everyone who is nonbinary.
An orientation describes a pattern, not attraction to every individual.

Nonbinary people all look androgynous.
Nonbinary people have highly varied bodies and gender expressions.

Ceterosexual attraction is automatically fetishizing.
Attraction becomes fetishizing when a person is reduced to stereotypes or treated mainly as a gender novelty.

1. Ceterosexual describes sexual attraction centered primarily or exclusively on nonbinary genders.
2. A ceterosexual person may have any gender identity, depending on how the label is defined.
3. Someone who is ceterosexual may also identify as bisexual, polysexual, or queer.
4. Being ceterosexual does not mean being attracted to every nonbinary person.
5. A ceterosexual individual should respect each partner’s identity, privacy, and pronouns.
6. The word ceterosexual is often preferred over the older term skoliosexual.
7. A ceterosexual orientation should not classify trans men and trans women as separate from other men and women.
8. Accurate use of ceterosexual should distinguish attraction, gender identity, gender expression, fetishization, and consent.

The term expands orientation language beyond labels built mainly around attraction to men or women. Its meaning remains community-dependent, and some users combine it with broader identities such as bisexual, polysexual, nonbinary, or queer.

Accurate sexuality education presents ceterosexuality without treating nonbinary people as a single type or sexual novelty. Respectful attraction recognizes individual identity, communicates openly, avoids invasive assumptions, and requires consent in every intimate relationship.